Footballer in sleep in a bed shock
A good bed can revitalize your career. A car can ruin it. Guess which is the priority for British footballers?
If sleep wasn’t important, we wouldn’t spend a third of our lives comatose.
Time in the sack allows the brain to unravel the mess of 16 hours’ worth of constant thought processes. That’s why lack of sleep can lead to fatigue, lowers your IQ and a whole spectrum of mental health problems.
Meanwhile, your body needs time to rest and recuperate. While your body is up on blocks for a few hours, ligaments can be repaired, muscles rebuilt and all kinds of vital tissue repairs can be carried out.
Animals seem to instinctively know this, and they pack in Zs at every opportunity.
Humans think they know better. Footballers especially. So after a long training session, during which their bodies and minds are being conditioned, what did British footballers do in the 70s and 80s? Went out smoking and drinking, naturally.
Passing time on long coach journeys
Sleep to a British footballer was a way of passing time on long coach journeys. Despite the contortions that uncomfortable seats forced Rodney and Stans’ bodies into, they’d still manage to drop off, because they’d have been partying all night.
Given the importance of sleep’s developmental effects on your mind and body, you would have thought that footballers (or their clubs) would insist on the most state of their art body conditioning beds possible.
But they don’t. They’ll blow several hundred grand, millions in some cases, on Porsches and Ferraris. Which do nothing for them.
And yet they buy the cheapest beds possible. Which is madness. A car can ruin their career. A good bed can revitalize it. Better sleep brings better rest and recuperation.
Sadly, the only time we hear about footballers and beds is when…. I’m sorry, I can’t write about this, there’s a gagging order.
Save your sporting career
Super injunctions aside, Beds can actually save your sporting life, rather than ruin it.
England rugby player Louis Deacon owes his career to a bed. Deacon, a 6’6” and 18 stone monster, is so big he could probably get into the Stoke team. But he chose rugby instead, so his body has been traumatized by crippling neck and back injuries.
To complement the surgery he was having, he was savvy enough to embark on healing regime. After his Pilates sessions (aimed at strengthening his core muscles) he would take to a specially designed sport mattress. The investment in a Mammoth Elite repaid itself a hundred times over.
“The Mammoth mattress certainly has helped my recovery and injuries – it really is fantastic,” says Deacon. At 30, an injury prone player could expect to be suffering the sleepless nights that haunt a player at the end of his career. But Deacon is in the form of his life.
The mattress is specially designed for sportsmen’s rest and recuperation. It has ‘high-specification foam’ which doesn’t over heat – as would normal beds when a high performance sports body is plonked on top of it.
Its ‘castellated zones’ mimic the shape of the body for the ultimate in postural support, spinal alignment and back care.
Cooling Air-Flow channels between the castellations allow the mattress to shed excess heat and moisture, so you do not get hot and sweaty in the summer months. I dare say they channel other gaseous emissions too.
The castellations also work independently so you are not disturbed by your partner during the night. Or, if you’re a British footballer, your multiple partners. Not to mention the reporter under the bed.
A special HydraFlex stretch sports fabric provides breathability and adaptability on the skin to give you greater comfort.
Which is important because, as they say in Polysomnography, you’re only as good as your last sleep.
SEVEN NOCTURNAL MUST HAVES FOR A BRITISH FOOTBALLER
A notching system for the bedpost
A hidden camera
A videolink to his lawyer
A hotline to the spin doctor
An early warning system that the manager is coming over
(Optional extra – a good night’s sleep)
By Nick Booth